New Year’s resolutions? I’ve got way too many projects waiting here at home to waste my time thinking up resolutions.
Unless the resolution is to get all those projects done before 2017 ends — and that’s just setting myself up for failure!
We don’t need no stinkin’ resolutions. Nope, for 2017, my focus is going to be on attacking and completing as many of the projects I have awaiting me here as possible — and I think the first will be to teach the dogs how to vacuum.
That’s not my fur rolling around the house like a tumbleweed. It came off the dogs. It’s their fur, they should learn to clean it up. I also have four cats, but I don’t think there’s the slightest possibility you could teach a cat to vacuum. That would be like, you know, Donald Trump being elected president of the United States!
Oh, hey, wait! Maybe there is a chance!
Of the many, many projects I have awaiting me — I think it’s somewhere in the neighborhood of 5,218 — I am going to move this heavy statue of this beautiful Goddess of Projects up to the garden in front of my house. She will look lovely there. Was going to get that done this fall. Right, so we know how that went.
She is very heavy (my apologies goddess), so will take some careful maneuvering to get her on to my trailer and moved. And she will need a coat of paint as well.
Can you Tremclad a goddess? Does she have to be sanded first?
Each project comes with so many demands that gobble up so much time! Maybe the Goddess will be the only project completed this year. Who knows?
See how that negative mindset sneaks in, intending to sabotage even the first real project I mention (I really don’t have any hope for the dog/vacuum thing).
No negative talk. I WILL get this done and, while doing so, will also endeavour to get a Bell player piano I have yet to pick up restored and playing like a symphony.
I mean come on: it was free, how do you say no to a free antique player piano?
Exactly, you don’t. So that’s in the mix for sure.
There’s a lot of painting that needs to be done, both inside and outside this house. I’m thinking I’m going to have to hire someone to do some of that.
Recently, a friend was touring the house and she said, "The carpet in these bedrooms has to go. You have pets, it’s much easier to keep the house clean and more allergy free if you don’t have carpet. Besides, this carpet is done, it looks ugly, it really has to go."
Yeah, gee, thanks for that. Drop by again some time.
The thing is, she’s right, so sometime in 2017, I’m saying goodbye to upstairs bedroom carpets and hello, maybe, to laminate flooring. Or lay-flat flooring. I’ll make that decision when the time comes. In the meantime, I’ll procrastinate about it.
There, I feel so much better already.
There’s no question I need new kitchen and bathroom countertops and bathroom sinks. And the front veranda has some rotten boards that need to be replaced where the water drips down from the eavestrough. The eavestrough shouldn’t be dripping like that, either, so that needs fixing too.
One more for the project jar.
Then the garage and shed have to be completely emptied and reorganized, and the caboose needs new roofing and its windows repaired.
Then there’s that book I’m writing. Got off to a good start, then realized I was writing an autobiography, which is not what I want to write at this point. I want something I can use to complement a keynote-speaking, semi-retirement career, so it has to be targeted to a much more specific area.
I’m sure, at some point, it will come to me what that should be.
I’ve also gotta get the unicycle fixed for the grandkids to learn how to ride. Gotta lose the five pounds and a bit I’ve gained over the Christmas and New Year’s food binge... which isn’t over yet.
And a friend tells me I have to learn to meditate, because "it will help you relax and focus more sharply and efficiently on all these projects you want to get accomplished."
So that’s another project I have to do immediately, or all the other projects will go as they have in the years leading up to this one — status quo, with many starts and few finishes — but damn, not an ounce of guilt, no matter what happens!
I’d call that a win-win all the way around. Happy New Year! And please send me your comments or feedback, because I would love to hear from you!
lmustard1948@gmail.com
